No, For Real, Take My Money

If you had the ability to provide me with a product or service, and in exchange I would give you lots of money, that would be great, right? Now, what if you had the ability to provide me and millions of my friends with a product or service, and we would all give you lots of money? Even better, right? Apparently not. Let me explain.

sponge

I went to the mall over the weekend, because I needed to get some new trainers. I usually get my marathoning shoes online, but I really needed a new pair fast, so I went over to Dick’s Sporting Goods. And while I was there, I decided to take a stroll through the clothing department. I am always on the lookout for workout clothes, especially pants. While I’m marathon training, I like capri-length fitted pants with a zipper pocket that will hold my cell phone. This combination of features is way more difficult to find than you would probably believe… if you’re fat.

dickssg

Because Nike had some super cute capri-length fitted pants with a zippered pocket that totally held my cell phone – I know, because I put my little iPhone in there and zipped it up. So why didn’t I get them? Not because they were expensive (they were, but I’m willing to pay for quality, style, and the features I want), but because they only went up to XL. A lot of times, XL is exactly my size, but that is almost never true when it comes to workout clothes.

nosizeSo many Nike capri pants if you’re XS-L, you can hardly see them all!

As I was leaving the store, a employee asked me if she could help me find something. I explained that they didn’t have anything that fit me, and she proceeded to tell me that even she can’t fit in Nike’s pants – and she was a lot smaller than me (I’m guessing maybe a 10 or 12?). And then she goes on to tell me that Nike sales rep for that store is my size and she is required to wear Nike clothes when she’s on the job. Well, of course she can’t just pick up a pair of pants in the store, because they won’t fit her. So she has to special order them.

extendedThese are your choices if you are 1X, 2X, or 3X.

As you can see from the images throughout this post, Nike provides a really excellent selection of capri pants to people with small bodies. But if you aren’t small and want color, pattern, and style choices? Tough luck. I guess that fat Nike sales rep must wear a lot of gray and black, eh?

2XLAnd this is your only choice if you are 2XL.

Why doesn’t Nike want my money? Why doesn’t any athletic clothing company want my money? Why are plus-size workout clothes either super tight, or super boxy and giant? Why can’t any company just take what they make for small people, and make those clothes available in bigger sizes? I just cannot for the life of me understand why Nike, or Under Armour, or Reebok, or Athleta, or any of the others don’t want my money and the money of other fat people who work out and need to wear something while they’re doing it.

simpsons

I’ve had a bunch of people tell me I should start my own workout apparel line. And that’s a brilliant idea, except I have no idea how to go about that. And while I love the thought of a fat person creating a line like that for other fat people, I just can’t shake the idea that these companies that already exist ought to give me what I want. But apparently they just don’t want my money. Weird.

batman

I’ve said it before, but apparently it bears repeating over and over and over:

shutup

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