I have this love/hate relationship with scales. No, scratch that – I just hate them.
I haven’t owned a scale since 2007, and it’s been a complete blessing for my mental health. Some people think I’m risking my health by not knowing what I weigh, but I choose to measure my health in other ways, such as my blood pressure, glucose, resting heart rate, endurance at the gym, increases on the weight machines. Those things make me feel strong and healthy. The number on the scale makes me feel anxious and uncomfortable – and worse.
Logically, I know that the number shouldn’t matter. If my doctor is pleased with my metabolic health and if I feel good, that should trump the number, right? Those things should make the number just another fact, like the fact that I am 63 inches tall and have been alive for 40 years.
But I also live in a society that places so much importance on that number, and judges people based on that number. Now, again, logically I know that it doesn’t matter what society thinks of my weight – and, of course, there aren’t many people on this planet who know the actual number. And yet it still bothers the heck out of me! Why can’t I let that go? Why, when the number is brought to my attention, do I suddenly become obsessed, want to restrict my eating, feel like I am a “bad” person… just for weighing whatever it is that I do?
Maybe you are lucky, and your number doesn’t bother you. Maybe it motivates you. Maybe it’s a neutral bit of information in your life. But if you’re like me, and the number on the scale affects you in a negative way, well… I’d like to offer you some great advice about letting it go. But the truth is, I don’t have any answers today. I don’t have any good advice for how to let go of the number, for how to stop the number from being such an influence on my life.
It’s weird: I can get really far in loving my body, for being proud of what it can accomplish and endure, but then that one stinking number just sets me back. Well, I never promised this would be easy, did I?
Okay, then, poll time!
