Ah, internet. You are a source of endless information, wonder… and really annoying things. Case in point? Stories about health, fitness, and – of course – the dreaded “obesity epidemic.” I read a lot of this stuff. And most of it frustrates and infuriates me. So, I’ve decided to do us all a favor and fix some of my favorite ( <— I typed that using the sarcasm font) headlines and stories of the week. Here we go!
Fixed headline:
We Finally Admit That No One Knows How To Make Fat People Thin Permanently, So Let’s Talk About Healthy Habits For Everyone Instead, Not Just The Fatties
Fixed headline:
The Correct Way To Lift A Barbell (Because Good Form Is Way More Important Than “Looking Stupid”)
Fixed headline:
Do These 10 Things In Your Kitchen To Feel Great
Fixed Headline:
Try These Moves To Help You Get Ready For An Active Spring (This Isn’t About Weight Loss Because It Almost Never Lasts, Especially The Fast Kind)
Fixed headline:
We Hereby Vow To Stop Pretending That Naturally Slim, Genetically Blessed Famous People Have Anything To Teach The Rest Of Us About Controlling The Shape Of Our Bodies
Fixed headline:
We’re Losing The D Word: No More Talk Of Diets, Ever
Fixed headline:
No More Obesity Scare Headlines, Either, Because We Are Finally Ready To Admit That No One Knows How To “Cure” Fat, So Let’s Talk About Health For All Sizes Instead
(This one is my favorite. A “motivational” poster!) Fixed headline:
Beaches And Bathing Suits Are For All Bodies, Not Just Those With Flat Bellies (Plus We Acknowledge That For A Lot of Women, This Is An Impossibility And The Whole Notion Of It Is Designed To Make You Feel Bad So You’ll Give More Money To The Diet Industry)
Did you see any interesting headlines this week? Share them (and your fixes!) in the comments.
