On the count of three, everybody shout their New Year’s resolution. Ready, set….
Hold up. Is your resolution based on guilt? Or is it based on joy? If your goals for 2015 are based on things that make you feel lousy, I want to stop you right here. Instead of making plans because you dislike something about yourself, why not make plans because you like yourself?
Take your weight. (I know you’re shocked that I’ve chosen this example.) Making a resolution to lose weight focuses your attention on something you don’t like: the size of your body. So you’re going to kick off the new year thinking negative things about yourself (even if your intentions about it seem positive). As we’ve discussed many times before, shame and guilt are not good motivators, and they won’t sustain you (or keep you warm) on those long winter nights.
Imagine turning that “lose weight” resolution around, and instead making a goal that focuses on the positive. Instead of “I’m going to lose 50 pounds in a month and wear a string bikini on my spring break vacation!” (and then feeling terrible about yourself when you fail), try “I’m going to find a form of exercise that I really love.” Or “I’m going to eat more fruits and vegetables.” There are hundreds of healthy habits that you can incorporate into your life that won’t necessarily budge the scale, but may very well improve the quality of your life.
Choosing a joy-based resolution opens up a world of possibilities. And they aren’t just limited to the physical. Make a resolution that focuses on your heart (spend more time with loved ones, chase a dream) or your mind (take that class you’ve always wanted to take, learn to meditate). When we think of the ways to expand our lives instead of contract them, the world seems bigger, brighter, and more inviting.
Big or small or in between, the resolution you pick can be a source of stress and frustration, or one of empowerment and hope. So, what do you think? Are you on board for choosing a resolution based on joy instead of guilt for 2015?
